Writers Ask: When to Quit Submitting

There’s a hashtag trending on Twitter right now called #ShareYourRejections. (#ShareYourRejection catches some leftovers.) I really love it. I love when the writing community focuses on real talk–the things we need to know as writers–rather than the shiny polished side. It’s even blossomed beyond writing to include rejections in other industries and even just in life. Most of them are positive, skewed toward eventual success stories, because that’s what’s motivating, although some are funny and a few are just sad. It doesn’t matter. To me, what matters is that people are openly talking about their failures.

I love failures. (Admittedly not usually at the time.) Mine, other people’s: it’s just such an amazing way to grow and learn. Every time I botch something, it’s an opportunity to step back and ask myself why and how I botched it. Can I fix it? Can I avoid doing the same thing again? Usually the answer to one or both of those is yes, and that’s gold.

Go to any writers conference and sit in on some panels, and you’re practically guaranteed to hear some form of this question:

How long should I keep trying to get published? How many rejections before I should quit? When should I trunk my story? How many times should I submit a story before I give up? When should I stop sending my story out on submission?

In the interest of taking a crack at answering it, I’m going to share my own rejections. On a favorite.

My short story “So Sings the Siren” was rejected by 17 markets before it was accepted by Apex Magazine.

It went on to become a Bram Stoker Award Finalist—a literal dream come true—open the Year’s Best Hardcore Horror Volume 3—a dream I hadn’t even dared to dream yet—be reprinted and audio produced more than once, and—perhaps most touchingly to me—has made more than one (more than one!) complete strangers’ personal lists of ALL TIME favorite short stories. I’ve received more praise and positive reviews for that little story than any other I’ve published so far. Obviously, a lot of people have really loved it.

But it was only the 18th market I sent it to that found it worth publishing. (For the record, that order is not a reflection of my ‘ranking’ of Apex or any of the other markets; it had more to do with what was taken up where and a constant rotation of pieces and markets. Apex was a huge bucket-list top-five win for me.)

Here are just a few of the things rejecting editors said about “So Sings the Siren”:

  • the story just didn’t cover enough new ground
  • misses an opportunity to be exceptional
  • didn’t do enough with itself
  • this didn’t stand out
  • more heart

More heart? That story is my heart. And yes, for those not in the field or new to the field, these things do hurt. They should. That’s okay.

Because you know what? Those editors were all right! So were the readers and reviewers who didn’t like it once it came out. Because all they have is their one opinion, and you can’t argue with an opinion. It’s literally just what that one person thinks. All you can do with an opinion that isn’t the one you want is consider it, accept or dismiss it, and move on.

I’m not saying the way I do it is right, but here’s the way I do it: I decide, once and only once, if I believe in the thing I wrote. If the answer is yes, I never give up on it. It’s that simple, and that hard. I might revise it, set it aside to come back to, knock it down a tier, whatever—but if I believe in it, I don’t quit until it’s out there. Even if it takes 18, 25, 50, or ??? rejections before that happens.

By the way, I don’t give up on markets, either. I sent Apex Magazine 10 different stories before they bought “So Sings the Siren.” I’ve sent them 1 after. (Nope, getting one story published doesn’t mean you’re automatically in for the next.) I will almost certainly send them more in the future, because they kick a lot of ass and I loved working with them.

But I don’t give up on stories I believe in, so 6 of those 11 rejected by Apex have since been accepted elsewhere—a few already published to wonderful reviews and reactions of their own. 🙂

So much of submission is luck and click and fit. There are countless big and small factors that go into acceptance versus rejection, and most of them you can’t control. So you do your best on the parts you can control (quality, work ethic, content, persistence, professionalism, etc.) and hope for the stars to align. Some of my very best stories still haven’t been accepted anywhere. (Some of my less-than-favorites got picked up right away.) That’s okay. Just don’t give up.

I’m serious, don’t give up. I’ve had a few writers see my list of published work and ask me how I’ve done it. As long as that sucker may look now, it’s taken me ten years of hard work to build it up. In those ten years, I’ve also built up a submission chart file that’s 80 PAGES LONG. (It has poems, stories, novels, queries, contests, and more.) Most of the cells are shaded red, not green. And there are stories with far more rejections than 17 that are still going out on submission. A different story that just got accepted at a different wish-list market (I can’t announce yet) was rejected 46 times first. I didn’t stop sending it out because I believe in it.

And of course, “So Sings the Siren” is one of my happiest submission tales. I have a dozen stories that have yet to find homes at all. I’ve had plenty of other stories published that didn’t get much or any fanfare. But I don’t know which ones will reach which people until I get them out there, do I?

If I’d given up on “So Sings the Siren” after my first five or ten or fifteen rejections, I might’ve spared myself some inconvenience, some brief hurt, some negative reactions. But I also wouldn’t have found so many readers for whom my words do hit home, do resonate, do mean something. I wouldn’t have cracked a bucket-list market or made my first ‘best of’ anthology. I wouldn’t have a Bram Stoker Award Finalist certificate hanging on my office wall, reminding me why I don’t give up. And I might not be here oversharing with you so that, hopefully, other writers can see my numbers and take heart too. We all fail. It’s just part of the process. It’s not permanent unless you quit.

So don’t quit.

Writers, feel free to share your own rejection stories below—uplifting or otherwise. All experiences are welcome here. And if you need more, definitely go snoop the hashtag #ShareYourRejections. You are not alone.

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Anticipation and Dread, or Why I Decorate Early

It’s funny, I’ve been meaning to post a blog to share some updates and releases with you guys, and when I took a quick glance at my last post about how much I love summer, it made me shake my head. I DO love summer. (Like, a lot.) But lately I am already itching for fall. JoAnn Fabrics has put out some of their autumn décor and I’ve gone more than once just to walk among it. There’s still a full month left before Texas even thinks about moving into fall, but here I am arguing with myself about pulling out the pumpkins even as I go to the pool as many times as possible to soak up the sun. What’s up with that?

I’ve always felt this way. I think it’s this: anticipation is just as much fun (if not more so) than what we’re actually looking forward to. Weird, isn’t it? But it’s true, maybe especially for imaginative people. Planning and making a Halloween costume is just as fun as actually wearing it. Daydreaming about an upcoming vacation is often as exciting as the trip itself. Choreographing a dance is almost as wonderful as performing it—in some ways, moreso. How many of my writer friends plan out elaborate books and even series that they never actually sit down to write? There’s a reason for that…

Anticipation is why I always push my holiday/seasonal decorations as early as feels reasonable. I don’t go too early because then it becomes the norm (mundane) and defeats the purpose for me—and I never cross before a holiday that comes first, because I like them to each be distinct and special—but I always go as early as feels reasonable. I like pumpkins on my mantle late in September and Jack-o-lanterns first thing in October, because putting them there is a tiny celebration of what’s to come. Anticipation.

So I’m not “over” summer yet. I’m still reveling in every perk it has to offer, from late sunlight to cold treats, but I am turning my eye toward fall. Just a little dreaming to get me through the hottest parts of the afternoon…

Fiction is the same way, you know. Just a little shop talk for the writers out there. Maybe I’m hyper aware of this because I write so much horror, which uses negative anticipation to build its momentum (AKA dread.) No monster or bad guy or scary thing will ever be quite as terrifying as the anticipation of coming up against it—of what our own minds conjure in the waiting. Erotica writers know this too. The build up is just as if not more important than the payoff. We, as readers, often think we want the ending, but the truth is that we want the wait. We love the anticipation. The better that, the better the story.

Speaking of stories! (Smooth, eh?) I have a few new releases that you might want to check out!

Suspended in Dusk II is out now, after quite a rocky publication path of two years. (Talk about anticipation!) This one earned its stripes, y’all. If you want the behind the scenes, I interviewed the SiD2 editor and publisher for LitReactor. Or if you just want the book, you can order it in ebook or paperback. The paperbacks are GORGEOUS. I can’t stop staring at mine. And what company to be in! Other stories in this collection are by Stephen Graham Jones, Damien Angelica Walters, Alan Baxter, Sarah Read, Nerine Dorman, JC Michael, Benjamin Knox, Paul Tremblay, Ramsey Campbell, Letitia Trent, Paul Michael Anderson, Gwendoyln Kiste, Bracken Macleod, Christopher Golden, Dan Rabarts, and Karen Runge. You really can’t go wrong with this one.

My story in the collection is “Dealing in Shadows,” which is perhaps one of my more personal stories to come out so far. It’s not me, and it’s speculative, so it’s obviously not my life, but it was definitely inspired directly by my life and my feelings about losing my dad. It’s dark, deep, very sad, and a little creepy. Editor Simon Dewar called it “gut wrenching,” and liked it enough to make it one of only two stories in the anthology pulled from the slush. (Yay, slush!) Reviewer GracieKat at SciFi and Scary said, “There was one in particular, Dealing in Shadows by Annie Neugebauer, that hit me very hard and everything about it was just so well done. […] (thank you for tearing my heart out of my chest and stomping on it, by the way).” That’s the kind of review a sicko like me dreams for. ♥

Also fresh out: Undead: A Poetry Anthology of Ghouls, Ghosts, and More by Apex Publications! I’m happy to have a reprint of my poem “Light and Liquor” in this big, dark collection of creepy little poems. “Light and Liquor” is a Spoon River poem, which means a soliloquy delivered from beyond the grave. It was first published in the Horror Writers Association Poetry Showcase Volume I in 2015. I’m pleased to see it among more creepy kinfolk in Undead. I haven’t received my copy yet, but I can hardly wait (again with the waiting). You can order one now in ebook or paperback.

And in a surprise release, my short story “Glove Box” is also out now in The Dark City Mystery Magazine July 2018 Issue. The digital collected issue is coming soon, but this time you don’t have to wait at all; you can read my entire story for free right on their website! This one is short, only about 2,000 words, and a strange, tense little ride. It’s mostly suspense with a little bit of mystery and a little bit of horror. I hope you like it!

And finally, here’s a quick roundup of the posts I have elsewhere that you might’ve missed:

On the Thickness of Skin- a call for writers to stop ignoring their emotional reactions to negative things for the sake of looking tough.

Poems to Read in an Existential Crisis and Other Unnecessarily Specific Recommendations- a fun way for me to tell you about some stellar poems you should read.

An Interview with the Makers of ‘Suspended in Dusk II’- the interview I mentioned earlier, with questions about setbacks, points of pride, and even some advice for writers.

Also, if you’d like to hear what’s going on with me as it happens, be sure to follow me on Instagram @AnnieNeugebauer to see my writing life in pictures! (There are a lot of pretty books and cute cats.)

Do you tend to anticipate the next thing like I do? Do you see it as part of the fun, or do you try to keep your excitement rounded up into the current season? I’d love to hear your thoughts about anticipation (or dread)–writerly or in general!

I hope you’re all (still) having a wonderful summer!

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Worth the Excitement

My life is brimming with excitement lately. For one thing, I’ve finally finished the WIPbeast—for now, at least; no such thing as The End for writers—and I couldn’t be happier. It was a thrilling, trying, fun, exhausting project, and I am so proud of it. I hope to be able to tell you all about it soon, but for now I’m just looking forward to a big check mark, a fresh slate, and…

SUMMER!

I adore summer. Bring on the heat, the sun, the lazy days, the late nights. I can’t get enough. Summer has always been a time of relaxation and freedom for me, so the fact that getting a huge project off my plate coincides perfectly with the start of summer is extra exciting. Already my head is churning and tumbling with new ideas, and this phase when I don’t have to pick one yet is just the best. I fill up my tank and see what floats to the top, then let it soak there until it’s niiiiice and full. (I think the end of that analogy is me squeezing out all the good stuff when it’s ready, but who knows.)

How do I fill up my tank? Well, vacation, for one thing! I’m well overdue for a trip. Traveling always sets my creativity on fire, and I hope this year will be no different. But really, for me, filling up the tank is actually about living fully. I work insanely hard, so I have to play insanely hard to stay balanced. This year I hope that will look like day trips, pool time, barbeques, baking treats, early morning walks, yoga and dance, goofing off with my friends, and consuming lots of great stories.

This week I’m going with a couple of friends to see Hereditary, which everyone is saying is one of the scariest movies in years. We’ve had a huge selection of excellent, high-quality horror films in recent years—The Babadook, Get Out, It Follows, The VVitch, Hush, It, A Quiet Place, Annihilation, Goodnight Mommy—so that’s really saying something! I especially love the trend toward stories that mean something deeper than surface thrills. Here’s the trailer for Hereditary. I am already scared. 😀

TV, too, has become an incredible playing field for dark, complex, meaningful storytelling. Some of the shows being made these days are as good as any movie—Orange is the New Black, House of Cards, Justified, Hannibal, and Mindhunter come to mind—and there’s one on the horizon that I’m so excited for I could explode:

Gillian Flynn’s extraordinary novel Sharp Objects is being made into an HBO miniseries! Unforgettable protagonist Camille Preaker is being played by Amy Adams. The trailer gave me chills. I’ve raved about Flynn before, so I’ll contain myself somewhat. (Check out my thoughts on Gone Girl and my quick run-down of all of Flynn’s publications.) But Sharp Objects, far and away, is my favorite of hers, and I’m stoked that it’s being adapted for TV. July 8: mark your calendars!

But, of course, most of my stories come in the lovely shape of a book. Once a bookworm always a bookworm. Summer is usually my best time for reading, too, so my list… might be getting a little out of hand. I recently re-read Marisha Pessl’s drool-worthy novel Night Film, and it was so enjoyable that I’m eyeing a re-read of my beloved House of Leaves. It’s only a matter of time. But I do try to read more new (to me) books than old, because there’s so many I haven’t gotten to yet!

First up on my list is Ellen Datlow’s Best Horror of the Year Volume 10, which comes out June 12. I’ve made no secret of my love for this series. They’re an auto-buy for me now. It’s a wonderful way to catch up on some of the best short fiction coming out each year. They’re a great mix of styles and topics, too, so there’s always a few I fall in love with. I might’ve recently bought myself volumes 2 and 3. Whoops.

(Like my photo, above, of Snaps trying to talk me into buying my only missing volume? I’ve started an Instagram account for all things writerly and bookish! Plus cats, of course. Follow me @AnnieNeugebauer to see my life in pictures, and say hi so I can follow back.)

Also soon is Paul Tremblay’s The Cabin at the End of the World, June 26. Tremblay wrote A Head Full of Ghosts, one of my favorites in recent horror. I can’t wait to get my hands on this new one! The description sounds amazing, and his books are always so damn smart.

Oh, and the next Tana French novel, The Witch Elm, comes out October 9. Yes, that’s quite a ways away; that just goes to show how excited I am. I pre-ordered it before Amazon even posted the description. It doesn’t matter. I’d buy French’s grocery list. She’s that good. She writes literary mysteries with beautiful complexity and exquisite prose. (Start with Broken Harbor.) I only wish I didn’t have to wait until fall.

But the next Laurell K. Hamilton ‘Anita Blake’ novel, Serpentine, comes out August 8, which isn’t so far away. Y’all know I love me some Anita Blake! I’m a sucker for an ass-kicking heroine. Sexy vampires never hurt either. (Whatevs, there’s room for scary and sexy; give me a break.)

That’s not even taking into account all the books I’ve bought, been gifted, or still haven’t read yet. Looks like I have my “work” cut out for me. Good thing I have so much travel and pool time coming up. 😉

How about something I’m excited about that’s happening now? My short story “So Sings the Siren” is still going strong! I continue to hear from readers and reviewers, and it’s unbelievably validating. This story has legs! You can now find it in a multitude of places and formats, depending on your preferences:

It’s still available at its original home, Apex Magazine. You can read it free right on their website, or you can order Issue 101 for your favorite e-reader. (Apex is always amazing and well worth a subscription, too, if you like speculative fiction.)

It was also reprinted in Year’s Best Hardcore Horror Volume 3 by Red Room Press, which you can get in print, ebook, or (soon) audiobook! If you’d like a sneak peek, they’ve posted my story as a teaser for the audiobook, so you can listen to the full story for free on Sound Cloud. Angel Leigh McCoy does a phenomenal job reading!

And last but not least, Tales to Terrify podcast the story in Episode 330 as part of their Stoker nomination series. They, along with everyone else involved, did a stellar job. Heather Thomas also gives an amazing reading; her little girl voice is spot on. Honestly, you can’t go wrong with any of these choices—and my story is so short that you can always check out more than one. 🙂

Before I run into the sunlight never to be seen again head out, here’s a quick roundup of my recent columns and announcements that have appeared elsewhere, in case you missed them:

You can tell I’ve been a busy bee, huh? It’s time to go chill out and let the bees do the busying!

What are y’all excited about? What are you reading, watching, listening to? I want to hear about your summer swoons!

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Unravel

Let’s finish off my National Poetry Month celebration with something… creepy. *evil grin* Y’all know I love a shivery little poem or two, so today I’m sharing “Unravel,” which was first published in the HWA Poetry Showcase Volume IV by the Horror Writers Association last year. I like to think of this one as a horror love poem–do with that what you will. 😉


Unravel

At night

I want to be the spider
that crawls into the hair
spread across your pillow
like an inky dream.

I think
if I could just
taste your nightmares
I could spin them
into something sweet;

I could reweave them
into something softer.

I want to nest
into the silken warmth
so like my home,

burrow down to the roots

unwelcome
unbelonging
unnoticed

but nevertheless,
touching your skin.

This is all I could ask.

© Annie Neugebauer, 2016

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Something in the Attic

I’m still celebrating National Poetry Month by reprinting a few of my published poems here. It’s a great way for me to share more of my work for free, and who doesn’t need new poems in their life?

“Something in the Attic” placed first in the 2016 Frederick J. McCarthy Memorial Award sponsored by the Poetry Society of Texas, and published in the subsequent prize anthology A Book of the Year. It’s a fun one for me. 🙂 I hope you like it!


Something in the Attic

There’s an idea nestling in the back of my mind
squirreling away materials
like a rodent in the attic –
I get only hints that it’s there:
scurrying, a vague woodsy smell.
At times, I find the mystery distracting
so I climb the ladder
and peek my head up, looking around,
but the idea has gone,
tucked tail and dived into hiding,
and the only proof I see that it was there at all
are teeth-mark nibbles on the beams, and a feeling
of recent vacancy, like a cool dent in a bed
once warmed.
What is it? I’ll find out soon enough.
For now I descend the ladder
and tuck the door up tight, listening.
But it’s only when I’ve returned to normal things
that the sound comes again,
bustling, hurrying, scurrying work
piled by small paws in a shadowed corner
to serve some later purpose,
for it is only in the dark
that animals make meaning;
it is only in the dark that new ideas thrive.

© Annie Neugebauer, 2016


Any other creatives identify with this one? I’m nearing the end of the process with the WIPbeast and have a little something rustling in the attic now…

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