aim small, miss small

Originally posted on March 3, 2010 at 6:10 PM

Anyone who’s seen The Patriot has heard the expression, “aim small, miss small.” This is a piece of advice generally used in shooting, referring to the target. For example, you are shooting at a traditional target-board. If you aim for the board, and you miss, you’ve shot the wood fence, space, or innocent bystanders behind it. If you aim for the bull’s-eye, and you miss, you’ve shot the next ring on the board.

Aim small, miss small.

This is what I’m trying to apply to my goals (read life). I’m not aiming for “success” or “publication.” I’m aiming for the bull’s-eye. High hopes. Specific, measurable goals. That way, if I miss, I’ll still be on the board. Because if all you’re going for is “success,” and you miss, where does that leave you?

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It’s all about the bundance.

Originally posted on February 18, 2010 at 10:10 PM

Some days, I wonder what on earth I think I’m doing.

Things you need for this business:

• talent
• determination
• confidence
• a thick skin
• patience

Where I’m at right now: overabundance of the first two (I’d like to think) colliding with underabundance of the last two (I’m quite positive) to form a very tenuous and wavy bundance of the middle one.

Luckily for me, I also listed them in the order of their importance—or perhaps, that’s just the order I’d like to think they go in, because that’s the order I have them in. At this point, who can say?

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How does anyone ever have time for anything?

Originally posted on February 17, 2010 at 4:40 PM

I feel like life goes so fast. I’m busy, and I don’t have time to do all I want to do. And the scary thing is, there are many more people even busier than I am. How is anyone supposed to get things done?

How the hell do people have time for children? Even in ten years or so, when we reach the age where we want kids, I can’t imagine being less busy than I am now. It’s a snowball effect. How can you bring a child into the world knowing that? It’s exhausting to me to even think of it. God bless good parents who find a way to do it anyway.

People say money can’t buy happiness, but it sure seems like it helps. Families where only one parent has to work have a significant advantage toward happiness over others. So I think that’s the goal: to make enough money now to be able to do that in ten years. But then there’s the argument over who’s the one to quit their job…

I can’t even go through my To Do List on a regular basis. Not just the extravagant stuff, even the “daily” chores don’t all get done every day. And the longer I live the more behind I get, so I don’t see how things will ever improve. I drink at least one Dr. Pepper a day just to keep up. I know it’s not just me; other people feel this way too. They get behind, they pay their taxes for 2008 in 2010.

Doesn’t it seem like the whole world is incurring a time debt? It’s like the US and spending, only with actions instead of money. How can we ever catch up at this rate? Inflation in personal goals and accomplishments means we expect more today than they ever did a century (or even a decade) ago. All it does is make us tired of not living up to expectations during the day and want to sleep even more at night. As if we can “store up” on sleep to take us through the crazy lists of things we create for ourselves.

How can we ever catch up?

It would have to be a global movement to slow down. Everyone would have to agree. And that’s not going to happen, because we’re raised and programmed in our own time, and most people can’t let go of that. I know I’m not going to be the first one to burn my metaphorical cash. So instead, let’s all just be… exhausted and unhappy?

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snow day

Originally posted on February 12, 2010 at 4:49 PM

We’ve had more than a foot of snow in the past two days. This is unheard of. It snows so little, so infrequently in Texas that my primary memory of snow is when we got some small, scattered flakes that didn’t stick when I was in fourth grade. It was such a big deal that all of the classrooms in every grade got to go out to recess right then, just because for some of us, it would be the only time we saw snow in person.

Granted, I live about 200 miles north of there now, though still in Texas, and snow isn’t quite as exciting here as it was back home. But for me, and the hub-a-bub, it still is.

And, apparently, it is for a few dozen college students from various small towns where snow remains the Loch Ness Monster of Texas. Everyone’s heard of snow days, but only a handful of veterans have experienced it. Thursday afternoon and Friday, UNT canceled classes and closed the entire university. Us kiddos went out to play.

Kyle and I stayed cuddled up inside until it got dark, amazed at the silence falling from the sky for hours on end. Eventually, though, restlessness set in and Kyle wanted to take his Forester out to test its four-wheel-drive and maneuvering capabilities. I knew he’d do this sooner or later, and I figured I’d rather be there when he cost us thousands of dollars in auto repairs than listen to the story later.

As Kyle pushed my worry-filled little heart to its limit around town, we ran into some really cool, really funny stuff. Exhibit A: The people who built the giant igloo outside Bruce Hall (a dorm on campus). It was really, really awesome. The entrance was tall enough to walk into standing up, and the top was even bigger. We drove by slowly, looking out our windows, and Kyle noticed that their roof was caving in. Bummer. We started to drive away, but then I told Kyle to back up.

I rolled down my window and said, “Hey, I don’t know if you guys know this, but if you light a candle in there for just a little while, the inside layer of snow will melt and then when it refreezes, it’ll make a shell so your roof won’t cave in again.” The guys just looked at me with these big, surprised eyes.

Then one of them laughed and said, “Have you done this before?”

“No, that’s what the Eskimos do.” (PC term is Inuit, but most people don’t know that, so I went with the traditional so they’d think I as slightly less crazy.)

“Wow, well… thanks.”

Tehe.

Exhibit B: Soon we came across people sledding on cardboard down this steep hill by one of the buildings across from the Rec. Kyle parked and we got out to go watch the ones closest to us. They were taking forever to build up their nerve, though, and the wind brought just a tiny snippet of the three boys down the way, “Okay, so once you’re airborne…”

Needless to say, they had built a snow ramp and were planning on doing a ridiculously hilarious/suicidal jump that would probably take them into the side of the building. We left for sanity’s sake.

On our way back, we encountered a couple mackin’ in the snow. Cute. We saw a whole family of snowmen outside someone’s house, each playing a different musical instrument. Also, some super drunk girls walking home from a bar that asked us our names and repeated them about twenty times before leaving us alone. We had a snowball fight and made a failed attempt at a snowman (I didn’t have gloves). Then we came inside and warmed up. 😉 (What? We’re married now!)

It was a fun night.

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Searching for Pineapples

Originally posted on February 10, 2010 at 2:41 PM

As my regulars know, I’m in the tedious process of extending the word count of my novel, St. George’s Eve. Adding words, phrases, and sentences here and there on every page takes forever, and honestly, isn’t much fun. What I have found, to my surprise, is that (at least the way I’m doing it, which is very discriminately) it actually makes my work better. So, it’s a lesson learned. But what is fun, more often than not, is adding entire new passages. Simply because it doesn’t take so long and it feels more natural to me.

Being the slave-driver that I am, I don’t allow myself to do these passages as I come to them. Even though they’re more enjoyable, they take away from the time I’ve set aside for the page-by-page process and I end up procrastinating.

So as I scroll through, adding bits here and there, I eventually come across a portion that can be expanded drastically by adding an entirely new section to the text. Not wanting to get sidetracked, I simply type “PINEAPPLE” and highlight it in yellow. Then I trudge along my merry little way with tiny snippets that take forever to add up to any 0’s in my final word count.

Once a week, I allow myself to search for pineapples.

I find all of them, with my “find” tool under “edit,” and choose the one that best suits my creative mood at the time. Then I get to really stretch my legs and go for a jog—metaphorically, of course. This is fun.

Why once a week? My critique group meets once a week on Tuesdays. I like to have something to take to that, or it feels like wasted time. And since I will have to write all of the pineapples eventually anyway, I always write one in time for this. It’s like a weekly allowance to reward myself for good endurance. And this week is sucky for me, so I’m getting an advance on my pineapples.

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